1/ RUGHOONAUTH Ravindrasingh, GHOORAHOO Subiraj, TAJOO Varun Kumar Singh: 1 vote. Zamai mo ti koir ki mo popiler kumsa! Mo in gagne ene vote! Ene sans mo konne ekrir!
2/ BASDEO Rajmohun, SARATHEE Jayraj:2 votes. Ki gran nwar zot p fer? Mo in gagne 2 votes moi, ki v dire c ene bon baz sa pou fer progres. Marker garder, prochaine elections, mo doubler mo votes!
3/ RAMKISSOON Hemraj, GUNOORY Dewanand: Zot gagne doubler, zot fer tapaz? Treble dividend pou moi! 3 votes, v dire next time banker!
4/ GRAND-PORT Eric Desire: Pa zis le port ki pou grandi prochaine fois! Mo 5 votes pou fer zot desire moi plis prochaine foi!
5/ RAMCHURN Aman: Laisse mo fer zot koner ki mo 6 votes pa dekrir mo orientation sexuel sa! Next time, zot pou koner kisan la ki mari!
6/ Nathalia Vadamootoo: 9 votes? Sa meme tou? Tou sa la grain bravate la pou narien sa? Retourne mo graines!
7/ PURSUN Vivay Kanum: Mo retire mo candidatire, et meme sa mo gagne 11 votes! 11 patriotes in fer zot devoir. Si mo ti dibouter, mo ti pou defonce filet! Merci Ayatollah Mouftah.
8/ LUTCHMAN Prasram, KARUTHASAMI Clivy Marino, ANTONIO Marie Laure Cindy Audrey: 16 votes, malgre ki in fini gagne lindependance depi 50 ans et mo blier et mo apel mo parti Mauritius Independent Party...et ban zenesse in avoy parti Jeunesse popiler ferfoute....et kan met linette soleil lor vache et donne li lerb sec, vache la koner ki p kouyonne li kan dire li Verts sa...
9/ PERSAND Karandeo: 19 votes pou Mauritius Conservative Party. Si selman Theresa May pa ti busy ar so Brexit ggtri, ti kapav donne coudemain...
10/ Nazir Ismael: 23 votes. Tou sa foi mo in al lor zournal, videos,zourlanus tire mo fotos, zis 23 votes? Ban nimak haraam!
Bon, aster nou guet rezilta ban ki koir ki vreman zot graines bien lourd...
1/ FAKEEMEEAH Cehl Mohamad, mo bon kamarade Disel: 48 votes! Haraam sa! pou ena inondation, la peste, cholera, SIDA, dan sa pays la! Reprezentan Bon Dier gagne zis 48 votes? Eoula! Kouma zot envi ki pays progresser kan la voix Bon Dier zot nepli ekuter?
2/ SUMPUTH-RAMCHURN Reshma: 62 votes? Kan gran dokter, gran politicien, gran economiste, gran edukateur Vasant ki bien kontan cleaner/librarian avek moi? Mo zoine Disel pou met malediction lor zot!
3/ JADDOO Chandarmansingh: 72 votes. Zot koner ki moi ki chacha et ki Sanita Juddoo ki niece? Respect zot pa ena zot favorise niece kumsa? Et mo ene gran academicien moi...
4/ BARBES-POUGNET Alexandre: 85 votes. Ki mo pou dire? Avek support mo ban kamarades RCP, sa meme tou? Mo koir in ler pou servi langaz ki sa macro Paul Lismore la servi souvan pou fer zot konpran! Ban ingrats!
5/ BEEJADHUR Yuvan Aunuth: 122 votes? pou ene boug malin kouma moi, gran economiste ki in sacrifier mo cariere pou mo vine servi nou pays? Zot pa in lire ban lartik ki mo in ekrir et ki mo meme mo pa konpran? Mo zoine Disel ar so malediction lor zot!
6/ Aubeeluck Danrajsingh: 118 votes! Mari score pou lile Moriste! Avek mo ti jeep et mo costume, mo gagne plis votes ki sa ban gran malin la! Zis 4 votes entre moi et Beejadhur, sinon lil Moriste balier karo!
And now for the real results that matter:
1/ PARAPEN Kuvalayan Kugan: 932. As long as what people here call the hard left, but which is hardly that, remains divided, today's score will be the inevitable result, unfortunately. Kugan and Jack Bizlall should have been on one ticket, fighting with one voice. But a candidate with potential, nevertheless.
2/ DIOLLE Marie Alexandra Tania: 1516 votes. Someone created by the media and who keeps repeating 'renouvo', 'gouverner autrement' and hardly anything of value, smiles a lot and brushes her hair with a sweet flick of her hand, must surely understand that these are neither necessary nor sufficient conditions for electoral success, esp when representing a party with as much credibility as diri kanz. And crucially, she must start treating the drooling tongues of sycophantic zourlanus as a handicap and not as the half way ticket to success. Fakes will eventually be found out. Always.
3/ MARAYE Dhanesh Raj, 2177 votes. What can I say about a party that has its leader and the leader of the opposition as its senior MLA in the constituency? They devised the worst slogan imaginable, " ene vote pou Dhanesh R Maraye, c ene vote pou Xavier Duval kom Premier ministre". A slogan born out of arrogance, of an insolent belief in the popularity of one man as expressed by opinion surveys vreman bidon, when clearly that is not the case.
To come fifth in the so called bastion of the leader is nothing short of disaster. And the nonsensical excuses of Aurore Perraud show how out of tune they really are with the feelings of the population.
4/ Jack Bizlall, 2611 votes. The best result by any candidate with the least resources available to him. Really quite outstanding. If I am not mistaken, he is the one who has received the least coverage from our so called 'free and independent' press. To come only 500 votes behind the party with 'la main prop', 300 votes behind someone whose big mouth has monopolised the attention of our zourlanus, and over 1000 votes ahead of the media's darling, Tania Diolle, is an excellent result by any standard.
5/ BHADAIN Sudarshan, 2913 votes. A calamitous result for a man who has become synonymous with incredible arrogance matched by a mouth that just does not know when to stop, if only to save his own skin. He has shown incredibly poor political judgement, first when resigning as minister, then from the government, then as MLA, in the childish belief that everyone will applaud his 'sacrifice' and rally behind his renewed desire to be reelected. He forgot his past as minister and the disasters he inflicted on us, and others remembered only too well. Quite hopeless really for someone who yaps day in day out about dinozors, but who has rapidly adopted the single most important quality of dinozors, and made it his own: to only listen to arse lickers who tell him non stop how wonderful he is and absolutely hate anyone who pinpoints his weaknesses objectively. Hard to see how he can come back after this...
6/ Sanita Juddoo, 3261 votes, a very honourable second for someone standing for election for the first time. She had a huge disadvantage to start off with and had to contend with it all throughout the campaign: The really incredibly stupid assertion of her leader that she is only here for the next 2 years and will go to another constituency at the next elections. How stupid can you be, 'leader of all leaders'? That, combined with the perception that Berenger had done the dirty on Vijay Makhan by ignoring his legitimate desire to stand as candidate, and the rumours that Berenger is yet again koz kozer with the MSM when everyone knows that this is the most unpopular government ever, were huge handicaps to overcome. But Sanita Juddoo did extremely well and even her few detractors have to concede that she is endowed with a gentleness, humility , and intelligence that is quite disarming. Great potential for the future.
7/ Arvin Boolell, 7990 votes, Winner. Always likely to be the winner despite some quite poor tactics, largely due to poor organisation. As I said before, whoever came up with the idea of making Arvin Boolell and others attend a VoH function in the middle of the campaign needs to be strung up from the nearest lamp post.
Like Sanita Juddoo, Arvin Boolell has been very humble and well mannered, with a natural ease with friends and strangers. And will hopefully reinforce the opposition faced with a very intransigent, arrogant, and incompetent government.
Finally, could someone have a word with YENKANAH Nasanah please? He got zero votes which means that not even he voted for himself. Poor man!